I’m not the only one fighting

I got up today, realized I was feeling much better than I have in a few days, and proceeded to make my all-important pot of coffee for my morning infusion.  Without my coffee reserves, the IV bag dries up and just hangs there with no purpose at all other than gathering sympathy from those assholes frequenting Starbucks.

I’m kidding.   About the assholes at Starbucks.  And the IV.   Because I’m a kidder.

But seriously.

I can’t afford Starbucks.  In fact, I’m not even buying Folgers these days, but rather the generic Wal-Mart shelf brand.

Boo fucking Hoo.

So what.  I still have my coffee, right?  I still have a roof over my head.

At this writing, I am unemployed for the third time this year, have been a couple months now.  Things are tough.


They’ve been tougher.  A helluva a lot tougher.


I’m a tough old broad.  And I’m strong.  Sometimes not real strong, but strong enough.

I have an interview today, and I am, once again, very hopeful for a positive employment outcome.  IF I get this one, I am hopeful for a long-term employment relationship instead of the short stints I’ve had this summer.   So cross your fingers and toes for me if you get a moment.  I know lots of people are asking for prayers and things to be crossed, and they probably need it more than me.  Just fit me in there if you can.

I read several blogs today and my heart was heavy with emotion for these people I’ve never met who spill their hearts out (much the same as I do) and put it all out there.  I just want them to know they are not going unnoticed or unheard.  I hear you!   We all hear you and we love you and we want your lives to get better.   We think you are amazing, strong, wise and (did I already say?) Amazing.

And we want you to be happy.  We want to be happy.

It seems like a very simple lesson, one that I continue to learn over and over again, but I learned today that I am not the only one fighting.  And I’m not the only one who cares.


If someone tells you they are struggling, please PLEASE take a moment and listen.  Give feedback.  Console.  Empathize without condescending.  But listen.  That’s all they need.  Really.  That’s all I needed yesterday when a dear friend listened to me cry and spill my heart out over the phone.  That was all I needed.   It takes an awful lot for me to spill like I did to her.  And she listened.  I won’t name names because she already knows how important she is to me.

Today I have strength and determination to deal with and hopefully overcome these “fighting days”.  Thanks to one person who listened.

Just so you all know, I am here for you.   And I will listen.  Just keep that in mind should you ever have one of those fighting days.



(Image from Google Images)

32 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. lbddiaries
    Nov 18, 2011 @ 09:10:55

    Just so you know, last night before I read this post or even knew you weren’t at that other blech job, we lifted you up in prayer and asked God to lead you to a great job that you would enjoy, not one of these menial insulting-to-you jobs. So I listen, too. You encourage and build others up – I know people are going to come out of the woodwork and do the same for you. You are my rockin’ friend and it is going to be okay.


    • tsonoda148
      Nov 18, 2011 @ 11:32:26

      Hi Nan. I certainly do know what a wonderful listener and friend you are, and I appreciate those prayers. Thank you, lovely lady. Hugs!


  2. Ally
    Nov 18, 2011 @ 09:45:02

    I’m listening.

    These are tough times. Lots of people I know are struggling and hurting and it really sucks.

    Consider my appendages all crossed for your interview! You’ll rock it!


    • tsonoda148
      Nov 18, 2011 @ 11:34:19

      Thanks Ally. I know your family has had unemployment struggles, too, and I’m so happy to hear things are improving for you all.
      Changing subject………just saw one of your tweets. You and Lela going to see Adam Ant? Sounds like a party!



      • Ally
        Nov 20, 2011 @ 19:08:16

        Yes we are! Don’t know whether to be excited or scared! haha

      • tsonoda148
        Nov 21, 2011 @ 08:47:04

        I vote for Excited! How’s Lela doing? Haven’t seen her post in awhile. Please give her my hellos and good wishes. xoxo’s

  3. Erin Margolin
    Nov 18, 2011 @ 10:07:03

    I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I am listening. It’s hard for me to keep up with everyone right now…but….I’m only a phone call away. PS I am sorry I still haven’t sent Curious Wine back to you—read it & LOVED IT. Promise to return it to you soon.

    Hang in there. You are tough and I know you, and you are going to get through this.



    • tsonoda148
      Nov 18, 2011 @ 11:36:18

      Hi Erin. So nice to see you on my blog. You are such a busy new Mom, I feel grateful you took the time out to write. Glad you enjoyed “Curious Wine”. It’s a classic…well in certain circles. No need to return. My gift.
      And, thanks for the words of encouragement. Much much appreciated!
      Hugs to you and little Piper!


  4. Robin Craig
    Nov 18, 2011 @ 10:12:24

    My dear lovable intelligent, beautiful SIS, Baby it’s not you it’s this dam economy
    It’s like this everywhere. The major problem with our government today is they dipped into our taxes., fee us to death, and layed around like fat belly pigs up in the senate for too long. And instead of we the people stand up shouting stop or well vote you out, we wimper “that’s just not right,just saying”. We the people should not be in the unemployment line, let’s put them in the unemployment line. LET’S START FROM THE TOP MR OBAMA’S OFFICE AND WORK THROUGH THE WHOLE CONGRESS SENATE STATE GOVERNMENT. LET’S STAND UP AND SAY “HELL NO WE NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANY MORE”.Instead of all this bull cramp of vote for one democrat and one republican who says the speak for the people let the people actually vote. And put the foreigners out of American business. Ok sorry to vent but it just pisses me off cause you decided to get a really good education and SERVE OUR COUNTRY and they wont give you the job you desreve cause they may have to pay you more than mimume wage.


    • tsonoda148
      Nov 18, 2011 @ 10:43:59

      Gosh, LIL Sis, do you have any idea how much I love you? Soooo much! And while I may not completely agree with your political views, I defend your right to scream them to the top of your lungs.
      I love you for standing up for me. Anyone out there reading this who doesn’t know my LIL Sis? She’s 4’11” of love, guts, grit and amazement.
      Thanks Sis. Miss you lots n lots. I’ll let you know how the interview goes.


  5. Eva Gallant
    Nov 18, 2011 @ 10:38:38

    I’ve even got my eyes crossed for you, which makes it very difficult to type. Good luck..hope it’s a good job and they recognize you are the right person to fill it!


    • tsonoda148
      Nov 18, 2011 @ 11:37:36

      Eva, thanks for doing all that crossing. I appreciate that. Just make sure to UNcross your eyes before you get behind the wheel, ok? LMAO. You always put a smile on my face, my friend. Thank you.


  6. Bridgesburning Chris King
    Nov 18, 2011 @ 11:31:17

    I hope things get better for you soon. Keep blogging..we’ll keep reading!


  7. Lorna's Voice
    Nov 18, 2011 @ 11:53:02

    Being “strong enough” is all you have to be. I find that comforting–no need to be a “Super Hero” in this life.

    I hope the interview went well. Just know that “we” are here to listen and help in any way we can.

    Hugs, Lorna


  8. My Inner Chick
    Nov 18, 2011 @ 13:49:45

    I am here for you, too. To listen. To hear what you have to say.
    I want you to know that….

    Your heart is BIGGER than Texas & Nevada & Minnesota!

    Good Luck on your interview :))) Xx


  9. cuhome
    Nov 18, 2011 @ 14:47:10

    Just keep hangin in. I’ve been keeping my toes and fingers crossed for you, all day long, and do you have any idea how hard it’s been to get around the house like that? Not only is it hard to get around the house with fingers and toes crossed, it’s friggin dangerous ~ nearly killed myself going downstairs earlier today. So I hope you got the job. I really do! d:^) Janet


    • tsonoda148
      Nov 19, 2011 @ 08:33:46

      LMAO, just conjuring up a visual on you descending the stairs. However, you need to keep everything crossed as I probably won’t hear anything for a couple weeks. Arghhhh!!


      • cuhome
        Nov 19, 2011 @ 09:46:43

        The peeing part is especially interesting. Getting those pants up and down? And I nearly ended up looking like a mummy, dealing with the toilet paper . . . but everything’s still crossed. d:^)>

  10. k8edid
    Nov 18, 2011 @ 16:55:23

    I’ve got everything crossed that I can, kiddo. Will say a little prayer, too. This economy is all effed up and I pray that things will straighten around. Get to writing, sweetie….the month is slipping away.


    • tsonoda148
      Nov 19, 2011 @ 08:34:55

      Hi Katy. I’m writing my ass off. It’s truly the only thing keeping me (halfway) sane right now. I’m on track, but just barely. I just posted a new peek at my novel. Check it out when you have a minute. xoxo’s


  11. Karla Telega
    Nov 18, 2011 @ 22:12:59

    I’ve always admired your strength. Sometimes we have fighting days, and sometimes the best we can do is to put one foot in front of the other and do the next right thing. They both take courage, and that’s something you’ve got in spades. You’re in my prayers, sweetie!


    • tsonoda148
      Nov 19, 2011 @ 08:36:09

      Thank you my friend! I really appreciate you and your support. This weekend, I’m working on NaNoWriMo AND my outline for the report I interviewed you about. I have to have a draft in by Wednesday. Maddening!!


  12. Vidya Sury
    Nov 19, 2011 @ 02:44:13

    Terri, I am waiting to hear how the interview went. I’ve got everything crossed. I am also listening and although we only recently connected, I’ve been stalking your archives, so there.

    Life brings shit sometimes, but it all balances out. I’ve been there, I’ve been through desperate miserable times, and I know. Hugs. Anytime you feel like chatting, you know am around. Love ya.


    • tsonoda148
      Nov 19, 2011 @ 08:41:44

      The interview went………uh, surprising. It ended up being an “assessment interview”. Not really an interview at all, but rather a series of tests. I think I did very well except for one of the math sections. You know the ones where they write a long paragraph. For example: “Tape cost $2 per yard. Sally bought 17 yards. If Sally uses 2″ of tape at a time. How many uses can Sally get out of her tape purchase? And? how much will each 2″ cost?”
      DUH. I mean, I could do it, but it takes me awhile, ya know. I don’t do math in my head. If only…..
      So I think I tanked on that part. Everything else was a cake walk though. THEN they said if they’re still interested, I’ll hear within a couple weeks.
      So my day ended a bit down. But who knows, maybe they’ll call me.
      Thanks for asking and your kinds words, my friend.


  13. Rachel (Totally Ovar It)
    Nov 19, 2011 @ 11:42:24

    I am ALWAYS here to listen to you, my sweet one. I have everything crossed, plus you’re in my prayers. Things suck right now. All we can hope for is better days, right? I feel truly blessed you are in my close circle of friends. Hugs and love to you, my dear friend.


  14. junemoon
    Nov 19, 2011 @ 12:53:50

    I am sending you much compassionate caring, Terri, as I read your words describing your current challenges. I think I know what you mean when you write about sometimes simply needing someone to listen and to really hear your words ~ no attempting to fix or advise or reminders to be grateful, etc. As a psychologist, I deeply believe that the greatest gift we can ever give is our focused attention through listening to what the other person has to say and what they need, not only with our ears but with all of our senses and our heart. junemoon


  15. Lisa @ Grandma's Briefs
    Nov 20, 2011 @ 22:22:32

    I love you, my friend, and hope and pray for good things for you. Such as long-term employment and Starbucks. Or at least Folgers.


    • tsonoda148
      Nov 21, 2011 @ 08:55:24

      Thanks Lisa. And thanks for that phone chat the other day. It brought me down off the ceiling and helped clear my head. You are amazing and my joy!


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